Well I went with my oldest daughter today for doctor appointments and buying school clothes plus supplies for two of my grandchildren who have ADHD. Thankfully Wal-Mart and the doctor’s office was only two blocks from each other. I say this because after we (Grandfather, Grand-daughter, and I) dropped off Mother and Grandson at his appointment, Grand-daughter was hungry so I said we would just take her to a place to eat in Wal-mart while they were at the doctor’s office. Grandson’s appointment was at 1:00 0’clock and thought hers was at 2:00 but no found out hers was at 3:00 so we had plenty of time. We found this out after we took her back for her’s at 2:00. The Grandson was hungry so we took him back to Wal-mart along with the mother so they could eat. Mother decided to buy school clothes and supplies while we were there so she wouldn’t have to go after the appointments, so she didn’t eat. Five minutes was all she had before Granddaughter’s appointment and Mother was just checking out with a basket of school supplies. I told her to go have Grandfather take her and Granddaughter to their next appointment and I would check out for her. She said,”But , Mama, (She does’t call me Mother) I may not have enough money to pay for everything!” I told her that I would take up the slack! Grandson and I stayed at the store while Grandfather ran Mother and Grand-daughter back to the doctor’s appointment. She had left me her money that she had which was more than enough. Grandfather came back so Grandson and I took her stuff out to the truck and since we had another hour to wait, we went back in to do some shopping of our own. Grandfather found shirts for $3.00 apiece and Grandson wanted a locking pencil box so I had to get Granddaughter something or she would have a fit, even though her Mother had just spent a small fortune on her. Their Mother called finally to say they were ready. Grandfather went to get them so she could come back and eat plus buy their school shoes which she didn’t get the first time around. Grandfather and I waited in the restaurant while she took them to get their shoes and some things she needed for her and Father. She had a list. We waited, and waited, and waited. Finally I called her to see how long it was going to be and the first thing out of her mouth was, “Come and get her!” The pop we gave her must have kicked in lol! Mother was beside herself! Finally it was time to go home. Mother wouldn’t let us stop and get root beer floats on the way home. She said she had a headache and just needed her coffee. I forgot to mention that the appointments were in another state an hour and a half away from where we live. So if she wasn’t stopping for floats she would just have to wait on her coffee although we were dieing for a cup ourselves. About ten miles from home I had her call the kid’s Father to have coffee ready when we got home. Grandfather hadn’t had his nap yet so after coffee he went to sleep while I decided to write this little bit of news. I call it ‘Memories’ because I have been transported back to the first day of school when my five year old son (He turns 41 this month) looked so precious in his new school clothes, and my oldest daughter (the kid’s Mother) four years later with her pretty little dress and new shoes, then my youngest daughter four years after that in blue jeans but still a classy little girl. Each one carrying their treasure of pencils and paper and a box of crayolas. The amount of school supplies these Grandkids needed was beyond belief! We have come a long way as far as education and I do not begrudge any teacher for having help with the teaching process especially with all the budget cuts and political woes of the day. I know most of these teachers supply many more things that aren’t even on the lists and God bless them all with courage and wisdom to teach in todays world. I was just walking through some old memories before I became Grandmother of nine and Great-grandmother of two. I don’t believe I’ll go next year. I will just sit at home and remember this year with my cup of coffee and Grandfather-smiling to myself.
Mama Needs to Tell You
When you were little I could hold you
Anytime I wanted too
I could hear your little giggles and sweet coos
See your eyes of sea-green blue
The smiles that lit up your face so true
Now that you are grown you have other things to do
Though it was me that moved and not you
I still need to tell you “I love you!”
And hear you tell me too
So when I call as I usually do
Answer the phone I need to talk to you
You can call me back if you want too
When all your work is through
Please don’t forget me as you sometimes do
Mama needs to hear your voice and say to you
How very much she loves and needs you, too!
God’s Golden Angel
She has touched my life with
God’s tender loving grace
Helped me through the pain that
Sometimes I can’t face
She has shown me the silent courage that
It always seems to take
To be a better person each morning
When I wake
She has been my beacon shining with
God’s great, loving Light
Giving me the strength to win
Each battle that I fight
With age-worn hands she has brushed
Away the tears
Circled me with loving arms
To chase away the fears
She has put me in her pocket
To keep me safe and sound
I only hope I’ll walk beside her
When she reaches, God’s holy ground.
Dedicated to Sister Eva Thorpe-1986-My prayer warrior!
We Will See
Will everything be all right?
Silence cries into the night
Weeping for what used to be
Now no more than a memory
Will everything be all right?
We will see says the night.
The Very Best Me
With my heart in my hand
I offer to you
The best that I am
The worse that I’ll be
I’ll not promise a thing
That I can’t keep
But with all of my being
My soul and my mind
I do promise to love you
For the rest of time
I’ll make mistakes
As you will see
Cry a tear or two
This is me!
I’ll proabably get mad
I sometimes do
When things go wrong
Or I get blue
When I can’t be strong
I’ll leave it to you
To be patient and kind
You’ll know what to do
Just hold me close
Show me you care
In your own special way
Always be there
And in no time at all
With our love we will see
The very best me
I was created to be! (9-11-2006) Read at our wedding November 10, 2006
Where’s the Chicken?
When I was about ten years old I noticed my older sister wasn’t having to do the dishes after supper. I asked my mama, “Why isn’t Mary helping with the dishes?” (Sounds like Martha in the Bible when Mary wasn’t helpng prepare the meal for Jesus.) Mama said, “Because she cooked supper.” I said, “You mean if you cook the meal you don’t have to do the dishes?” ‘Yes.” my mama said. Well the only thing I hated worse than chopping weeds was doing the dishes so I immediately said, “Well teach me to cook!” This began a very slow process of teaching a tomboy how to do things that meant she had to be a girl thus preparing her for the day she would be a wife and mama, I think. The first thing I had to learn was to make biscuts. We were fairly poor I guess because we got commodities which included flour. My first experience was scary because I wasn’t supposed to do something or the biscuts wouldn’t raise or maybe that was the cornbread I had to make another day. Well anyways my first batch of biscuts turned out kind of okay but had little pieces of baking powder in them which hadn’t mixed into the batter right. I guess that was my fault but don’t really remember. The gravy was thick enough though that we could use it for biscuts if we wanted too. I made a pound cake along about this time also which weighed about 20 pounds. I think I invented a new kind of brick. Well back to the biscuts. The second batch proved to be deadly. They were like hockey pucks. No amount of gravy could save them. After everyone had a good laugh at my expense we were going to just give them to the hogs. We lived on a farm so garbage was very appreciated by the animals. About three of us kids (there were nine of us) went outside and spotted some of mama’s fruit jars sitting next to the old smokehouse where we cured our hams. I don’t remember which one threw the first biscut at a jar but it exploded like a hand grenade had hit it. It made the most amazing sound too. Oh wow! This was going to be fun. All of us started throwing them and shattering the jars. We had a bountiful supply of biscuts because there were about 15 people in our family and generally there were enough to each have two plus if company showed up, which we had a few relatives that did this just about every mealtime, and Daddy usually took a few in his lunch pail. After the initial firing of the biggest biscuts, mama’s old red rooster came gawking out across the yard. To this day I don’t know what possessed me but I pulled back on that old rooster with the last biscut I had in my hand and fired. That biscut hit that bird with the accuracy of some of the rockets they have today. I believe they call them smart bombs. Well what I did wasn’t so smart. I hit him square in the neck and he squawked real loud and went to flopping on the ground. Scared me so bad that I think I screamed. Then the humor hit us and we went to laughing until mama came out to see what was going on. I really thought I was about to meet my Maker and probably said a quick prayer. Mama was really cool about her rooster because she said she didn’t ever much care for him cause he flogged us sometimes. She even had a good laugh over the irony of it-then she saw her fruit jars and her face went ghost white. She could cook that bird which we did that night for supper but her jars were valued highly because we canned everything and these would have to be replaced with money she just didn’t have. Needless to say I didn’t get a whipping for killing that old red rooster but for busting mama’s fruit jars. All that were involved in this crime went around with little red bottoms for a few days. My chicken killing days are over and my cooking finally got raves from anyone who ate at my table but I will never forget the ‘old red rooster who not only paid the price for my cooking lessons but gave his life to improve them. Where’s the chicken? Forever etched in my memory!
Beloved Friends
When time takes us down
The trail of life
It does not ask
For directions
God chooses the path
We meet eternal blessings
And earthly hardships
Along the way
See many a beautiful thing
Encounter the saddness
Of broken hearts
As we travel on
Beholding the miracles
That only faith an bring
We see that within
The mountain’s height
And the valley’s depth
Are the precious wonders
That we call our
Beloved friends.
The Lazy Snow
A lazy day of drifting snow
Curled up within my mind
Each thought, each memory
As different as the flakes themselves
Where was I when I first knew,
What snow could do for the mind?
Was it when I was a child of long ago?
Did I make snow angels?
I don’t remember any more
Were snowball fights a part of my youth?
I remember I had to work
Water needed to be carried
Animals had to be fed
Snow covered hay for the cattle
New hay had to be strewn
I remember cold hands without gloves
Did I play between chores?
I built the morning fire in the old wood stove
Carried in more wood and kindling
Making the coffee for the grown-ups
Was a must do for me
Nine children were cared for
I was one of six that went to school
Two and a baby stayed home
Did they play in the snow?
I don’t remember seeing snow angels
When I got home-took care of them
Had more chores to do-cooking ,cleaning
Dishes to do-then homework
Seems like something always had to be done
I remember looking out of the window
After I had gone to bed
Snow was falling-had it erased the day?
I don’t know was I old before my time?
Where was I when the effect of it’s softness
Made its way into my soul, my thoughts?
I remember being tired, but happy and content
Was I comforted like now by it’s beauty
I don’t remember-but it doesn’t matter
I have this beautiful day of lazy snow
As I curl up within my mind
Can’t stay long though-still have chores to do.
Glorious Breath
memories linger
haunting thoughts
deepening hole
can’t breathe
shadows dancing
reaching out
falling-falling
can’t breathe
swirling mist
lost souls
tormenting tears
falling-falling
can’t breathe
catch me-catch me
pleading-bleeding
looking up
expecting hope
lightning flashing
hands reaching
grasping-floating
saving grace
praising-loving
glorious breath
freedom-freedom
rising-rising
Glorious Breath!
Every Trail
every trail I have come across
led to every place
I have ever been
whether I took them
or simply passed on by
they knew the way
that led me straight to you
so abide with me
stay close to me
lead as you always do
so that every place
I will ever go
is still the trail
I walk with you.