2/24/08

Today I left to security of quiet and walked out on a limb

Then opened my mouth

When will I learn that I cannot talk and climb at the same time?

I always end up with ‘my foot in my mouth’

I came tumbling down among the tarnished crowns

That I have saved for myself

Who do I think I am? That’s it! I do not know

Who I am or what I am!

Earthquakes in my soul shake the tree I try to climb

I hang on but barely

I want someone to help me but who do I trust?

I’m afraid I can’t get back or can’t go forward

Stuck comes to mind

Trapped out on this limb of my own making

Choices I made becoming the fruit of my life

I’m just me and not very good fruit right now

Picked to soon then hit by the bitter frost of reality

Robbed of nutrients to grow beyond myself

I don’t even know what kind of fruit I am

Am I a pear? Am I a peach?

Or am I an inedible useless thing

That looks and acts like real fruit?

Or am I only an imitation of someone else’s idea of me?

I guess I’ll just fall to the ground

And nourish someone else’s tree

So they can be proper fruit

With out feet to crush me

For he can do no wrong

Imperfect comes to mind

Pruning away the cause of the damage

Might be the only option

For now I must be really quiet while

Out on this limb for he might hear me

And throw a rock at me

That will hurt and leave a bruise

Bruised fruit soon rots and decays

Gives up or let’s go

I just don’t know! How do I fix this?